The Best Sort of Chaos
by existence555
Summary: Short pieces of varying length that center around the Straw Hats. Just about their daily lives. Chapter 02. A pair of Nami's panties at last... Or is it too good to be true?
1. Permanent Macho Supaness

**A/N: I find myself missing random Straw Hat moments, so why not create them? I will be writing more, though I can't say how often. Review, _please_!**

Nami came storming onto the deck, her glare fearsome enough to make Chopper hide behind Robin's legs.

"Where is Luffy?" the navigator asked, her tone soft but deadly.

"Oh, Nami!" Luffy exclaimed, popping up from behind Zoro's chair. "Were you looking for me?"

She walked over to her captain slowly. There was seemingly nothing threatening in her demeanor but Zoro knew better; he hurriedly went over to calm down the shaking Chopper.

"Luffy, how could you ruin _another_ map?" Nami raged, her mood suddenly darkening. "I worked on that for one week and in one second, your stupid peach juice ruined it completely."

"Heh, sorry," Luffy apologized.

He reached up to scratch his head. The innocent gesture didn't get him any sympathy from Nami. Her punch sent him flying into the side of the ship. Luffy sighed as he landed with a loud thump.

"Nami, I said I was sorry," he reminded her.

"Idiot," she muttered.

With that, she turned to make her way back to her room to start making the map all over again.

"Excuse me, dear lady."

Nami rolled her eyes and turned to Brook, her arms folded over her chest.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I need a favor," Brook told her.

Nami tried to take caution in making her decision but it didn't work out too well. She nodded, giving him a cue to go on.

"I need to see your panties," Brook said seriously. "The ones you are wearing now."

She let out something between a snarl and a growl before going into her room and slamming the door, not even bothering to dignify Brook's request with a response.

Zoro scowled; he'd have to deal with the scared Chopper for the rest of the day now.

"Why is she like that?" Chopper queried quietly. "The rest of us didn't do anything wrong."

Robin gently patted him on the head.

"You should know, as a doctor," she pointed out. "You've heard of PMS, I assume?"

"Do you mean PERMANENT MACHO SUPANESS?" Franky yelled, running over in excitement.

Zoro wanted to ask him if he was serious but decided against it.

"No, she means probably the most scary," Zoro explained. "It's a woman thing."

"Wouldn't that be PTMS?" Chopper asked, confused.

Robin smiled and shook her head.

"He's not telling you the right thing," she chuckled. "But be sure to look it up sometime."

"Yeah, I will!" Chopper agreed, nodding enthusiastically.

"And, Zoro," Robin began.

She stopped talking when she realized that Zoro and Usopp were having a serious talk about what they should shoot at Nami through her window. Trying to hide her amusement, Robin cleared her throat loudly.

The two looked up from their intense discussion. Usopp was apprehensive; the beads of sweat would surely start rolling down his face if Robin said anything about their plan. Zoro was impassive, just waiting for her to say whatever she wanted to say.

"I would recommend nothing sharp," Robin said finally.

She was right. A drop of sweat ran down the side of Usopp's face almost immediately.

"You're right!" he exclaimed. "But I had already worked that into my great plan, of course. I was just testing Zoro to see if he was paying attention. Obviously, he wasn't, so he must be quite unintelligent. Just like I originally thought…"

"What the hell are you saying?" Zoro grunted, glaring at the younger boy.

"Ahh, nothing!" Usopp protested.

As Zoro pulled out a sword, Usopp started running away, very quickly. The green haired man chased after him, intent on getting revenge for the absentminded remark.

"Oh, are we playing tag?" Luffy asked, excited. "Zoro's it!"

"SUPA!" Franky called. "I'm playing too!"

Chopper bounded over to Luffy, his eyes shining.

"Me too!" he declared. "Everybody, run away from the crazy swordsman!"

"What are you people calling me?" Zoro growled, picking up the pace.

Robin's smile widened and she calmly picked up her book and resumed reading.

"THE NEXT PERSON THAT RUNS INTO MY ROOM IS GETTING ELECTROCUTED!" Nami screamed, more furious than ever.

Brook considered that for a moment.

"Perhaps," he said thoughtfully. "If she electrocutes me, I will end up on the floor and she will end up standing over my fallen body. And then, of course, I will be able to see her panties."

"Perhaps," Robin agreed. "I'm sure Usopp wouldn't mind shooting you through the window."

"Thank you for the tip, beautiful lady," Brook grinned. "You have my eternal gratitude."

Robin eyed him, the smile never leaving her lips.

"I'm not showing you my panties," she told him, her tone suddenly chilling.

Brook immediately went to join the game of tag.

"Usopp!" he called. "I need you to shoot me through the window!"

A few minutes later, Robin smelled burning hair. She was almost worried enough to go check on the skeleton but when she heard the contented sigh, she just smiled.


	2. Evil Object Burning Pirates

**A/N: Another Straw Hats moment. Enjoy and review! :)**

Sanji looked at the scrap of clothing in awe.

"Really?" he whispered. "Nami-san's panties?"

"Yohohoho," Brook chuckled. "I was finally successful. The beautiful Nami gave into my request and provided me with this magnificent artifact."

Chopper looked at them quizzically.

"I still don't get what's so special about them," he said. "They're actually kinda gross and scary."

"Ignore them, Chopper," Zoro called. "They're lovesick idiots."

Zoro looked up lazily as Sanji whirled around to glare at him.

"These are _precious_," he informed him pointedly. "A brute like you could never understand the volumes of love in these panties."

"And an idiot love cook like you will probably _make_ love to those panties," Zoro drawled. "Come on, Chopper, let's do something worthwhile."

Sanji chose not to come up with a retort, instead watching Zoro and Chopper walk away.

"They don't understand us," he murmured.

"Of course, nobody understands this sort of exquisite thing," Brook agreed.

They stood in reverent silence for a few moments, until they were interrupted again.

"What do you have here?" Robin asked smoothly, examining the panties with a raised eyebrow.

Sanji laughed nervously and Brook tipped his hat to Robin.

"This is the fruit of my labors," Brook replied, nodding seriously.

"You know, there's an ancient superstition that if a man wears a woman's panties, she will fall in love with him," Robin told them. "I've–"

She wasn't allowed to complete her sentence because Sanji and Brook dove for the underwear at the same time. Robin quickly moved out of the way and went to join Chopper and Zoro on the other side of the deck.

"You set that up," Zoro grunted.

Robin smiled and turned to look at him.

"There may be a belief like that somewhere," she shrugged. "But never one that I've heard of."

Zoro smirked as Robin watched their friends fight over Nami's panties. Chopper looked apprehensively at one, then the other, and finally settled down and watched along with Robin, shaking his head in disapproval.

"She gave them to me," Brook insisted.

"My love for her is true!" Sanji declared. "How can a skeleton satisfy Nami-san's needs? Don't be ridiculous."

"Now, now, let's not fight," Usopp interrupted, as he walked onto the deck. "We can settle this in a manly way."

Brook and Sanji looked at each other and nodded before moving aside to let Usopp gaze upon the panties.

"WE BURN THE EVIL OBJECT!" Usopp shouted, whipping out a pack of matches. "We should not let it pollute the atmosphere like this. You know, back when I was the Captain of the Evil Object Burning Pirates, we used to do this all the time…"

"No!" Sanji and Brook exclaimed simultaneously. "Don't do it, Usopp!"

A blue haired man managed to grab the panties before they caught on fire.

"You guys are SUPA!" Franky whooped gleefully.

"What are you doing with those panties?" Sanji asked, angry.

Franky shook his head.

"This is my original speedo," he explained. "Oh yes, this is my most reliable one. You can imagine how devastated I was when I woke up and found that it was gone."

Robin's giggles were delicate and feminine but Zoro's roars of laughter were anything but polite. Chopper was rolling on the ground after a few seconds, his legs wildly kicking at the air. Brook and Sanji looked as if a giant wave had just crashed down on them.

"Your _original speedo_?" Sanji asked in disbelief. "I was pledging my utter devotion to your original speedo?"

"Yohohoho, at least we didn't put them on," Brook pointed out. "Then Franky would have fallen in love with us."

"I already love you guys," Franky sobbed, hugging them happily. "You would do such a thing for me… You are true friends."

Sanji and Brook could do nothing but sigh in disappointment.


End file.
